Mind-Body-Soul #4
Digital Overload & Detox (+ Flu), "Healing Soup," and the "Serenity Prayer"
The Mind-Body-Soul series is a monthly round-up from the author of Human/Mother that aims to feed the minds, bodies, and souls of “cycle-breakers” or “people who identify and intentionally change negative patterns, behaviors, or traditions within their family or relationships.”
Mind
Over the past couple of months, I’ve slowly weaned myself off of all social media platforms (with the exception of Substack). I still have accounts but no longer keep the apps on my phone (including Substack, as needed). Because of this, I’ve noticed a striking difference in my headspace: I’ve become more intentional with my time and energy and less distracted by the goings-on of the world.
That is, until this week. The flu hit our household, and I found myself bored and lured back into that web of manufactured dopamine hits, isolating algorithms, and endless hot takes. At the end of a particularly technology-heavy day, I found myself feeling worse—exhausted both physically (from the flu) and mentally (from the dire state of things according to the Internet).
Yesterday, I listened to
’s latest episode of his podcast, Soul Boom, wherein he interviews Bobbi Althoff. I’ll be honest: I’d never heard of her but apparently anyone of the millennial/Gen-Z demographic has (IDK???). Ever since leaving the middle school classroom and becoming a mom, I’ve been completely out of the loop when it comes to pop culture. I digress.Throughout the interview, the topic of anxiety—something that Althoff admits that she deals with on a regular basis—kept resurfacing. At one point, Wilson, recognizing and acknowledging Althoff’s struggle, offered this bit of wisdom to which he attributes to his therapist: “Anxiety is a warning sign. It’s telling you that you need something. It’s telling you of an unmet need… So [when you’re feeling this way] ask yourself, ‘What do I need? A nap? A hot bath? A hug? A walk in nature? A break from screens?’”
Of course, I, a pretty self-aware human being, already know this information, but I realized after hearing his words, I needed the reminder. I needed the illumination.
And then, this morning, I read
’s most recent post published on her Substack newsletter, Letters from Love. I was immediately enthralled by her response to the question, “Dear Love, what would you have me know about keeping my heart open?”Gilbert writes, “There will always be people who are unsafe to be around – sometimes for a spell of time, sometimes for a lifetime. Being open-hearted doesn’t mean throwing open the door when someone is standing on the other side with a knife or a maniacal grin or a revenge fantasy. If the door needs to stay closed, keep it closed. But be patient. Be even more patient. Be ready for miracles. You don’t have to manufacture miracles. That’s what the mind wants you to do! But that’s actually what the heart will do… Set boundaries where your mind tells you that you must — but never think the mind is sovereign over everything else. Remember that fortresses can crumble, if given enough time. Open hearts are infinite. Open hearts are patient. So let your mind be a bit humble, even as it goes about its business of setting rules.”
And so to resist the urge to doom-scroll and spiral into oblivion, I’ve made the conscious decision to remain open-hearted (even when it feels incredibly vulnerable) and to spend the remainder of my illness doing one or all of the following: reading a book (I’m currently reading
’s memoir The Electric Woman: A Memoir in Death-Defying Acts), resting in silence with my eyes closed, writing for pleasure and not for work, listening to gentle music (Any Khruangbin fans out there? Were you also stunned by their “Best New Artist” Grammy nomination???), or snuggling on the couch with my two sick little suns.Already, my mind is feeling better.
Body
Though I’ve not enjoyed being sick, I have enjoyed the forcible, physical halt to rest and recover. December and January were both very busy months for our family (despite my intentional pruning of insignificant seasonal obligations and unrealistic expectations).
It’s been so nice to just lay around the house without the pressure of busying myself. It’s been so lovely to take an Epsom salt bath with rosemary and eucalyptus oils after putting my coughing kids to bed. And, it’s been so invigorating to go outside, sit out on the front porch, and enjoy the fresh mountain air and warm, spring-like temperatures here in Appalachia.
Today, with as many windows open as possible, I made what I’m calling “Healing Soup” (recipe below).
To begin, I sauteed the lemongrass-turmeric paste in olive oil and dumped in all the aromatics and spices to wake up the flavors. Then, I added a whole chicken and filled the pot with water to boil for an hour or so. Once the chicken was cooked, I took the chicken out, shredded it, and discarded the carcass. I then skimmed the top of the broth with a strainer and threw in the savoy cabbage, shiitake mushroom, shallot, and red bell pepper. Once the veggies were cooked down a bit, I tossed the shredded chicken back in.
To avoid overcooking the noodles, I made them separately (according to the package instructions), rinsed them with cold water, and then left them to drain in a colander.
To serve, I placed the noodles in my favorite ceramic daisy bowls (a TJMaxx find) first and then ladled the soup over top. I finished each bowl with a squeeze of lime, a sprinkle of cilantro, a jostle of fish sauce, and a bit of chile crisp. Voila! Bon appetit! Tomorrow, I may even get crazy and add a poached egg or two to the leftovers. The world My kitchen is my oyster, after all.
Healing Soup
Makes 10-12 cups
1 jar of Mekhala organic Lemongrass Turmeric paste (I purchased at Whole Foods)
6 tsp. of grated ginger (I use Trader Joe’s frozen ginger cubes)
6 tsp. of grated garlic (I use Trader Joe’s frozen garlic cubes)
1-2 tsp. cumin
1-2 tsp. coriander
salt + pepper
1 whole chicken
1 red bell pepper, thinly sliced
1 shallot, thinly sliced
Half of a savoy cabbage, thinly sliced
1 small container of fresh shiitake mushrooms, thinly sliced
1 package of Lotus Foods organic pho rice noodles
Finishing touches: cilantro, lime, Red Boat fish sauce, Pulp or Fly by Jing sichuan chile crisp
Already, my body is feeling better.
Soul
Admittedly, my soul has not been well either. The lead up to the inauguration and now the commencement of a new presidency have left me feeling dazed and confused. I feel caught in the crossfire of American politics, trying to parse what I should be paying attention to and what I should be disregarding.
It’s been: not fun.
During Rainn Wilson’s interview with Bobbi Althoff, he brings up the “Serenity Prayer” as a method to quiet the noise in our heads and find peace. I hadn’t thought of the prayer in years. It became popular in AA groups (and other 12-step recovery groups), but, as Wilson suggests, it applies to all scenarios in life that would be considered difficult or challenging.
I’m not a devoted pray-er like my Granny (bless her soul), and I don’t consider myself to be particularly religious (due to my traumatic religious authoritarian upbringing). But, in times when I am feeling discouraged or dismayed, I find that meditating or saying a prayer is helpful. I wonder if its recitation today would be helpful to you, too? Here it is:
The Serenity Prayer
God, grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change
the courage to change the things I can
and the wisdom to know the difference.
—Reinhold Niebuhr, 1892-1971
Already, my soul is feeling better.
I hope yours is, too.
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Share-and-Tell In the Comments👇
What’s feeding your mind, body, and/or soul today, this week, this month?
That Gilbert quote hits home today. Thanks for sharing! Keeping an open heart despite ALL the things is life’s work. Let me know if you figure it out, haha. Hope the rest gave you some peace, friend.
That memoir sounds epic, I’ll have to look it up. Sounds right up my street ❤️✨